Ali Forbes has been wrestling with this question for over a decade: What happens when you can’t get alongside someone else, due to illness or some other obstacle?

I first began having bouts of fatigue about 12 years ago. I recovered for a bit in 2017 before declining again. I had another period of recovery in the summer of 2021, but by November I was already struggling and during a work trip my energy levels crashed. I’ve been in a state of perpetual fatigue ever since.

It’s been a lot of… just waiting, doing nothing. I’ve been able to read and do some studying and this has allowed me to write and to pray into what God’s been teaching me.  

Suffering takes you from a position of thinking that God is just going to keep you safe from all difficulties to understanding that God will help you persevere and endure difficulties. He’s greater than the worst things the devil can throw at you.  

Instinctively, when I’m trying to give someone an idea of who God is, I end up filtering God and being a bit shy about some parts of his nature. We think we’re helping the world by doing that, when in fact we need to present God unadulterated.  

Recently my dad saw a local elderly lady (who grew up in the church but had never committed her life to Jesus) in the shop, and she said, ‘Have your son come to visit me.’ I don’t have lots of energy and I’ve got to be selective in my daily activities, but I went round, and we got straight into talking about God.  

I’ve been round to visit her three times now. Each time, I’ve been able to share the gospel and just be open about her need to repent and believe. She’s 90 now, so it’s fairly urgent. I have an open door and I’m just walking through and taking the opportunity.  

My expectation is that God wants to use me to reach the lost, to go out and find the people with good soil and be direct with them – maybe even to do some street preaching, which is a scary idea!  

I hope to get back to discipling people who need to be nurtured. But in the meantime, with the little energy I have, I look and wait for the opportunities God provides.